Authentic living, my journey

As I have grown older and have faced many challenges which come as part of life, I am starting to feel that I am indeed a survivor, victorious in many ways. I felt a greater desire to start sharing some of my life journey and experience with those who may be going through what I have already gone through. I have come to the realisation that God created us all differently with unique gifts, and the way we cope in different circumstances varies from person to person. If my story, my experiences and my journey can inspire someone of the same disposition then I will have achieved my goal.

One thing l know for certain is when God created us all he made no mistakes, we are all originals and no one else looks or sounds like us. Therefore, we need to boldly carry ourselves with pride and unapologetically be our honest selves in love, peace and harmony, while utilising our God-given strengths and gifts by being authentic instead of living our lives the way the world expects us. By living our true self and “simply being us” we can be so creative and effective because we will be operating from our natural selves and doing things that that we love while being driven by passion. That will be an amazing place to be, and the world will indeed be a better place if most people managed to do this. For a start there will be more fulfilled people serving others.

“Authenticity,” as described by Polly Campbell four years ago is “To be genuine and authentic is to merge who you are – the characteristics, qualities, values, skills, flaws, and passions you hold within – with how you behave. What you hold within is reflected in how you move through the world. It is all of you”

“Your life is your own, don’t waste it trying to be what others expect you to be. Don’t sacrifice your happiness to make everybody happy. Don’t give up on your dreams to build other people’s dreams. Your life is your own. Be who you want to be” – Unknown

How liberating this is, to be able to let all our guard down, transform our dreams into realities and simply be us instead of being people pleasers constantly worrying about the expectations of others. For me the journey to being authentic has required having to travel back in time to when I was young and take a look at the innocent young girl I once was before I was programmed by the world around me, and slowly but surely that little girl (me) dwindled into thin air and all the life and aspirations she had were slowly sucked out of her by external voices, comments, cultural norms and attitudes from those she came into contact with. My identity was then influenced by my social environment and those that I saw as role models as we naturally do when we are young. We believe the things that are placed on us by our parents and families based on our culture, religion or gender norms and in that process our personality vanishes as we embrace these new identities. This unfortunately is a sad truth for many of us.

I have been working so hard on finding myself, and now life has more meaning, I am starting to practice self-love more and worrying less about other peoples’ opinions of me. I am starting to feel comfortable in my own skin, expressing myself through my writing while discovering who I really am. I am slowly starting to pursue my passion by doing that which makes my heart tick and valuing myself in the process. I am constantly practising gratitude, being conscious of my actions, words and how those may affect others. I am finding my joy, my dance and finally singing a brand new song in my heart, one of true joy, happiness which comes from a place of love and contentedness.

My wounds of the past are finally finding meaning as my story unfolds and it is all starting to fall into place because my story is definitely paved by my past, however harrowing or sad. Without my past, my scars and negative experiences, I don’t think I would have stood the test of time as I have done. It had to happen that way to give me the extra fighting power I need to survive now. All in all what a beautiful story of a triumphant girl from Africa who is an inspiration to many, thank you Lord for your mercies which endure for ever. This journey is truly a healing process for me, I encourage you to try this.

When we don’t live authentic lives which are aligned to our souls, and live lives of just getting through each day, we end up not being creative and our lives lose their meanings. This road can lead to lack of motivation and drive, self-loathing, or in some cases depression and over-eating, and for some people can lead to addiction and self-rejection. When our lives have meaning and purpose, we take better care of ourselves, this creates positive emotions of happiness, pride, hope and fulfilment. In turn we can pass these positive vibes to those we come into contact with. As the saying goes, hurt people hurt others and broken people break others, be it consciously or unconsciously.

Shelly Webb x